Sunday, December 16, 2012

Fashion Advice for Girls

I find fashion to be irritating.  For the most part I'd rather ignore it.  However, its seems that modern girls are unable to find clothing that fits them well and looks good.  In other words, its a rare girl that is able to dress herself competently.

Here is some fashion advice from someone who would prefer to forget the subject, but you girls are so doing so badly that I need to tell you what you are doing wrong.

1. Designer stuff is unnecessary - Sometimes we buy things because it is a stylish brand.  This is fine, if you can afford it.  But spending a lot on clothes because of a brand name is a waste of money if your goal is to look good for a guy.

Straight guys don't know the difference between a Vera Wang purse and a Target one.  (I don't even know the name of another designer.)

Would you girls think less of me if I drove an Ferrari 355 instead of a 458?  Do you know the difference between those two car models? Do you care?

Its the same with designer clothing for straight guys.  If you want to impress other girls, gay guys, or you can afford it, then go for the overpriced stuff.  Otherwise skip it.  Being able to live frugally can be a virtue.

2. Don't wear dirty clothes - I'm constantly surprised at how often I see girls wearing dirty shoes and dirty sweatshirts.  Do those of you that wear them think that you look good while doing so?

I seem to see a lot of girls wearing sweatshirts with holes in the ends of the sleeves.  Why would you continue to wear clothes that have holes in them? 

Wearing dirty clothes shows that you do not care about your appearance.  It says that you are unable to keep yourself clean.  Is this the message that you want to tell the world?

3. Flip-flops look terrible - It seems that every girl owns several pairs of cheap, dirty, foam that they wear because they are "comfortable."

I'm sure that there are lots of fat guys who think that wearing speedos is comfortable.  Should they wear them every day?

Wearing flip-flops says , to guys, that you are dirty, lazy, and don't care too much about your appearance.

Wearing a better sandal says, to a guy, that you care more about your appearance, are more stylish, and therefore better than girls wearing cheap dirty foam.

Because so many girls dress badly these days it shouldn't be too hard to dress better.  You can't dress better than other girls by dressing the same way.

BTW, the only sandals worse than flip-flops are better flip-flops.  The standard flip-flops are cheap pieces of junk. If you spend more than a couple of dollars to get flip-flops that are made out of leather, have gel soles, or have flowers on them, then they show that not only do you not care about your appearance but you also think that investing real money in awful fashion is a good idea.

What guy wants to spend time, and money, on a girl that thinks that spending money on awful and expensive things is a good idea?

4. Uggs are ugly - Not only are they ugly, but they are named uggs because the designer's wife thinks that they are ugly.

Another problem with Uggs is that they cost too much.  (If they were free, they'd still cost too much.)  In order to wear ugly boots, you need to spend a pile of money.  Apparently, genuine UGG brand Ugg Boots can cost $150-200!

I had no idea that they could cost that much.  I did not like them before I knew how much they cost, but now I'll question the intelligence of any girl who wears them.

For less than $50 you could get these boots:

I guarantee you that guys will hit on girls wearing these in preference to those wearing $200 ugly crap.

Try this experiment:
  1. Find a girl who looks about as good as you do
  2. Wear exactly the same thing
  3. One of you wear uggs, one of you wear the above recommended boots
  4. Count how many more guys talk to the girl with the good looking boots first
I bet that you'll be surprised at how many guys prefer not-uggs.  My guess is: all of them.  Ask them which they prefer, if you still disagree.

You can't dress better than other girls by wearing the same thing.  Wear something better than other girls and marvel at the difference that it makes.

5. Dresses and skirts are good - Its not often that I see a girl in a dress or a skirt, and that's quite disappointing.

What do celebrities wear on the red carpet? Dresses? Or dirty sweatshirts?

Why wouldn't wearing a less formal dress be better than wearing the same junk that other girls wear?

I can't express in words how much better a girl looks in a dress compared to the average crap modern girls wear.


(Note how the model is not wearing flip-flops.  Note that no model wears flip flips.  Is that because flip-flops are too stylish? Or becasue they look like hell.)

I submit to you that unless its cold out, or you are going to be doing manual labor, there is no reason not to wear a dress or skirt.

They look amazingly better than any kind of pants, or (heaven help us) leggings.

Dress buying notes:
  • Too high above the knee can look slutty
  • Floor length is not for casual wear
  • Show off your narrow waist
  • Straight guys don't care about the brand label
  • Dresses made out of cloth patches make you look homeless
Even if you are flat chested, have no butt, and are very plain looking, having a narrow waist makes you more attractive than "girls" who are fatter than you.  If you've got a narrow waist, then show it off!

6. Don't wear pants that are baggy in the butt - If you wear baggy in the butt pants, then I figure that your butt matches.  Tight pants on a girl are a wonder to behold.  If you don't want to wear tight pants, then wear a dress or skirt.  They look better anyway.

I'll fitting pants are a sign of sloppiness, and who wants to be around a slob?


So, those are six points for women's fashion.  If you wear, and don't wear, the things that I just listed then you will look better and get more positive attention from men.

You can't dress better than other girls while wearing the same lousy crap that they do.

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